Globusz^® Publishing 

The SSCE was gradually coming to an end. Ifenna had just two subjects remaining for him to write: Economics and Igbo Language. These were no bother to him as, in his mind, they were of no relevance in his future. So he considered himself through with the rigours of secondary school life. Ifenna had not yet recovered from the blow he got on the Biology exam day. He had fumed throughout the week and got in a row with his best friend, Fidelis, who he accused of conniving with Onochie to ruin his examination. They had exchanged harsh words for some time and nearly came to blows. But after some days, they reconciled and united again in what they know best—examination cheating. Buying examination papers, ‘fake’ or ‘real’ was however ruled out. Consequently, Ifenna joined the league of those who burn the midnight candle. But while others packed their knowledge in their brains, Ifenna packed his on tiny sheets of paper.

Ifenna’s mother was very impressed one night, at around 11pm, when she met her son still seated at the dining table, ostensibly studying. She came over to his seat and Ifenna looked up at her.

“You’re still reading, Ife,” She remarked.

“Yes,” replied Ifenna, trying to gather and conceal his ‘expos’ unsuccessfully.

“This WAEC is really getting at you. Keep it up.”

She took up one of the sheets of paper filled with tiny writings.

“What are these for?”

“When I read, I jot down certain things so that I can remember what I read.” Ifenna lied.

“That’s good,” encouraged the mother innocently. She left the dining room and went back to her room.

The next day she came back from work with ten tins of milk and kept them at the refrigerator. She called Ifenna and said:

“Ife, the tins of Peak milk in the fridge are for you. Use them to cool off from time to time.”

She added some admonition about being serious with studies and reading. Ifenna had heard those times without number and they hold no significance for him.

Ifenna nearly exhausted all the examination cheating techniques under the sun. In one of the papers, he had copied relevant parts of his textbook on a foolscap sheet, which he attached to his inner wear with office pins. While he was struggling with his shirt to have a glimpse of the ‘expo’, during the exam, one of the invigilators had seen him. It was Mrs. Ezeani, the Chemistry teacher. Ifenna quietly implored the woman to spare him. She requested for the illegal materials and Ifenna handed them over. She crumbled them and stuffed them in her handbag and left him to continue writing. Ifenna met the teacher after the exam and thanked her profusely for what she did for him. She accepted his thanks and said, “Be very careful. You might not be lucky next time. I did this only to save the school’s reputation.”

On the day, they sat for Economics examination; Ifenna exchanged his chair for a tall stool. He had scouted the entire school to acquire the seat. Sitting on it, he looked like a sportsman on a motorcycle race. His fellow students who knew what he was after could not help giggling. Ifenna was not alone in the game as, looking around the hall, he could see several other boys on similar stools as his. Thankfully, his neighbours desks were considerably low. On Ifenna’s right sat fat Dan, who tried very hard to ignore him and on his left was Uche. Ifenna was happy as he was getting a clear view of their respective desks. The fact that they might not be sure of what they would write did not give Ifenna any cause for worry.

Less than three hours later, everything was over. Ifenna went over to Uche and patted him on the back.

“Thanks a lot,” he said, shaking Uche’s hand.

“It’s alright, Ifenna. Though you nearly put me in problem that time you were requesting for number 4a. You should have seen the way the external examiner was looking at us.”

“Do you mean it?”

“Sure. You’re a lucky chap. Our Economics master called him to come over to the back just when he was about to walk over to us.”

“Well, thank God. These people will never let us feel free in this exam. It’s all over now, anyway.”

“There is still Igbo Language.” Uche reminded him, laughing. Ifenna laughed too.

“Who is worrying about that one?” said Damian, who joined them as they emerged from the door of the hall. Excited youths swarmed all around them. Most were in high spirits, the reason being that only one more examination paper separates them and the outside world.

“No one should worry about Igbo. You can write that even if you’ve been sleeping all through your secondary school days,” concluded Damian.

“Yes oh, my brother.” Ifenna agreed.

Nnanna Ekpe passed the trio half way to the hostels, in front of the SS2 class.

“Hi guys.” He greeted and shook hands with everybody.

“Nnanna I know you’ve given the markers of your Economics paper a big work. I saw you scribbling furiously through out the exam,” said Uche.

“Uche leave me oh. What else are we here for but to read and write? Anyway, how did you guys find the exam?”

“It was okay,” replied Uche. Uche and Nnanna were slightly ahead of the group now. Ifenna and Damian followed up at their back. It was said that birds of a feather flock together. The latter duo and Nnanna were anything but birds of a feather.

“What textbook are you using in Igbo Language?” Nnanna asked his companion.

“None. Why do you ask? Don’t tell me that you are about to start reading for Igbo eh?”

“Yes of course. Why won’t I read for Igbo? At least, if not for any other thing, I have sworn to make distinctions in all the nine subjects I am doing and that include Igbo Language. Let me go and take my siesta and commence reading.”

“O boy, take it easy oh. Nine distinctions? hmm.”

“Uche, bye.” Nnanna set off briskly towards the hostels. He was always in a hurry. Uche was rejoined by Ifenna and Damian.

Finally it was all 0ver. The Igbo Language examination day came and passed. The boys bade each other farewell. Most were happy that they were finally free from the demands of school life while others were sad at having to part with cherished school friends. Addresses were exchanged among the departing students while their friends in junior classes gave them gifts.

Ifenna did not have much packing to do having being a day-student. He was, however, not left out in the last minute noises and merrymaking. His last greeting to everyone was “see you on campus!”, implying that they would meet again soon in the university campuses. Fidelis, too, was as loquacious. The two friends were glad that they could meet anytime they want, as they were both resident in Onitsha.

When the excitement of leaving school abated a little, one issue that had constantly perturbed Ifenna towards the end of his exams reclaimed his mind. He had the fear that his result in most of the subjects might not be presentable. He was particularly worried about Mathematics, which, he knew, would be an important O’level requirement for his admission into the university. He knew that anything less than a credit in Mathematics and English Language would disqualify him from university admission. Several probable solutions had cropped up in his mind, prominent among them being to register for the private candidates’ General Certificate of Education (GCE). The exam would be coming up later in the year. ‘The problem’ Ifenna thought ‘is not the exam to write, but how to write it to get good results.’ He decided to confide in his friend, Fidelis.

A month after they finished their exams, Fidelis visited Ifenna. Ifenna was alone at home when his friend arrived. He was watching movies.

“Heh, Fideh, come right in” Ifenna welcomed him.

“Take a seat. Have you been to B.S.S. since we left?” he asked as Fidelis sat down.

“ No, why would I go there? I‘ve taken all my things. The next time I will set my feet there will be when our results are out.”

“ Me too” said Ifenna.

“ I heard that the S. S. 2 guys are having a go at the seniority thing, flogging, slapping, extorting...”

“ Let them enjoy. It is their time. Soon they would get tired of it or Mr. Ezeh will roast them.”

“ What’s the title of the movie you ‘re watching?” asked Fidelis.

“ Oh, that’s X-men. Have you watched it?”

“ No, I don’t think I have. Where are your people, Ifenna? Are they all out? “

“ Yes. Mum’s gone to her school; you know she is a teacher. Dad is on one of his endless business travels and Nnenna is at school. She is a boarder. Actually, my mother and I stay most of the time.”

“ In this big apartment? You ‘re a big boy oh.” Fidelis was glancing around, admiring the grandeur of the large room. The whole floor was tiled. It was wealthy man’s sitting room by every standard. Six armchairs, all thickly padded with foams, stood at strategic corners of the room. A cabinet stood close to the tinted glass window, bearing several costly electronic gadgets. Most impressive of them was an ash-coloured 24 inches television.

“That’s the situation, my brother” Ifenna replied.

“Ifenna have you registered for GCE?”

“No, in fact, I’ve been thinking about that. You know, I messed up some of my papers in WAEC- no thanks to those fake expos. I am especially worried about my Maths.”

“ Then what are you waiting for? You have to register immediately. I’ll be getting the forms for myself next week.”

“Getting the forms is not the problem,” Ifenna argued “the problem is; how are we going to write the exams? Or have you become a serious student overnight Fidelis smiled.

“Is that what is bothering you? Let me tell you, GCE is the sweetest exam you will ever write. You know schools have nothing to do with it?”

“Yes, but how is it going to be sweet?” Ifenna was now very serious.

“How did you write UME?”

“Will that type of ....runs be possible in GCE?”

“Why not? I know of a thousand and one extra-mural centers that organize such things. You give them the money and they handle the rest, they even have exam centers of their own; some of them, anyway. You have heard about ‘special’ centers, haven’t you?”

“ I have heard about them, though I don’t know much about their programmes. How exactly are these people going to be help to us?”

‘Well I do not have every detail now. What I know is that...we pay, they organize some sort of ‘help’ programme in some place and the exams would be written smoothly. Never mind, we would find out later. Have you heard from Damian?”

“No” replied Ifenna. He stood up, no longer interested in the movie showing on the 24 inches television.

“Fideh, let’s go and find out more about this GCE thing. Is there a centre near-by?”

“Yes, there is one centre at Awka road, but relax, let’s finish watching the movie. There is no need hurrying over there. They will always be there.”

“Oh. As you wish.” Ifenna accepted resignedly. Sitting down again. The weird-looking figures of X-men displaying fantastic stunts on the screen ceased to held his attention.

Later in the afternoon, two teenage boys with jubilant expression on their faces emerged from a storey building along Awka road. They strolled along the road. Occupying a section of the upper floor was Success Academy, an extra mural centre.

“I told you that this is going to be sweet. The only issue now is the money.” Fidelis was saying. “Fifteen thousand naira is not a chicken change.”

“Yes,” Ifenna agreed “but so far it could achieve what it is meant to achieve, we could run around for it.”

“What was that town the man told us that they normally go? Have you ever been to the place? “asked Fidelis.

“Me? No. What business do I have with Yoruba hinterland? This will be my first time of going the West – if this will work out.”

As they got to Total Filling Station, they crossed the road, which was crowded commercial Buses, taxes, Lorries, hawkers and pedestrians.

“ I will take a bus from here “said Fidelis, loudly enough to be heard above the noise of hooting horns, screeching tires and loud conversations going on around them.

“Ok, so, when are you coming to my house so we could go and register? Or should I come to yours?” inquired Ifenna. He shifted nearer the gutters as a motorcycle came very close to him. “You no deh see?” he shouted in pidgin at the motorcyclist who did not even bother to look back.

“ I will come over on Monday. Hopefully I may be with the money. Then, we could come here and register, well?” Fidelis looked at Ifenna’s, eyebrows raised questioningly.

“Monday will be fine. Good-bye” Ifenna walked off toward his Inland town residence as his friend signaled a bus to stop.

Ifenna met his mother at home when he got back. She was at the dining table, taking her lunch.

“Mummy. Good afternoon,” Ifenna greeted as he sat on one of the big armchairs in the sitting room.

“ Ehe Ifenna. Where did you go?

“My school friend, Fidelis, came and I went to see him off.”

She nodded and wondered why he stayed so long in just seeing someone off.

“Go and take your food in the kitchen.” she said.

Ifenna lumbered off towards the kitchen. He came back carrying a plate of Jollof rice. He went back to the armchair, dragged a side-stool to his front and placed the plate on it. He made to go and switch on the television but changed his mind.

“Mummy.” Ifenna called.

Mrs. Udemba glanced up from her meal and at her son.

“I want to register for G.C.E.” said Ifenna.

When she finished munching the food in her mouth, she asked, “Has the registration begun?”

Yes. It’s almost coming to an end. The exam will be starting in October, and this is July.”

“You want to take the exam?”

“Yes mummy”

“Okay”

“The place I want to go and obtain the form from..., they also offer tutorials to help the candidates. They will teach us until the exam begins” Ifenna lied.

“That’s a good idea. That will keep you from mischief. I hope their teachers are good enough?”

“They are very good. The only problem is that the fee is too exorbitant. “Ifenna unconsciously held his breath. This drill had to work.

“How much is it” Ifenna’s mother asked mildly, “Fifteen thousand naira.”

She was silent for a while. For Ifenna, it was like eternity.

“The fee is for both the tutorials and the GCE. Many students like to register with them because they are very good.” Ifenna explained anxiously.

“I will give you the money so that you can register with them. When are they starting the tutorials?” Ifenna felt like jumping from his seat, but he held himself.

“They‘ve already started; though I can always catch up with them.”

“I will go to the bank tomorrow. Don’t think I have money to throw around. You must have to bend down and read your books. This time that you are no longer in school, I would not want to see you rambling around town. Then, you should mind the kind of friends you keep. Someone that wants to go to the university should learn to cut off certain pleasures until he has achieved what he wants. I know why I’m telling you this.”

She finished eating and stood up.

“Take these plates back to the kitchen when you are through. “She said gesturing at her plates.

“Yes mummy “Ifenna answered with a spurious meekness happy that he achieved such a big feat, so cheaply.